It’s Weird…

 

As I get older, the busier my life becomes. Don’t grow up kids, it’s a trap!

It’s weird because when I was younger, I wanted to be older. A contradictory sentence, yes, but bear with me.

What I meant by that was I wanted to mingle with adults since they looked like they knew what they were doing. They looked like they had their life sorted and you’ll always get this one aunt or uncle who keeps asking you: “So, what do you want to be when you’re older?” Your answer may be as common as a doctor or it could be something unique such as an English-teaching ninja (they exist somewhere). Either way, just talking about growing up used to excite me. How wrong was I to think that adults have their life sorted!

Now, looking back I regret it. I don’t regret being who I am, but I regret the fact that I rushed the process. I never really enjoyed the moment and the journey of growing up. Yes, there were times where it was difficult, but when looking back, where they really that bad? The answer could go either way. Yes, since a few upsetting memories still stay with me and no, because my worries and priorities are now completely different to when I was younger. Looking back to when I was a child, I missed the moments where every break time, I would be excited to go outside and play in the playground. Even though I didn’t have a lot of friends, I liked my own company. I didn’t savour the moments where I was too busy having fun, that I didn’t care about what people thought of me.

Then, I grew up. Now, other people’s words and what they think of me affects me. I guess, in order to restore the sanity in my life again, I’ll have to go back to being the innocent young, child that had no worries (apart from which chocolate bar to choose).

“The hardest part of growing up is letting go of what you were used to and moving on with something you’re not.”